literature

Ffor the Win

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Literature Text

I doubt many others could pull off appropriation like I do. I could write Edward Cullen and the Half-Blood Games and make it better than Twilight, Harry Potter and The Hunger Games all put together. That’s how good I am.

I write fan-fiction of nursery rhymes and classics so well that they get published — by Hodder and Stoughton, no less. No self-published internet gimmickry for me, no sir.

Forget your little tumblr accounts filled with Hiddleston, Cumberbatch and Supernatural: my novels are full of appreciation to great authors, each and every one an homage to the Brontë sisters or the Grimm brothers, Dickens or Orwell, Humpty Dumpty or Mary Mary Quite Contrary. I know what has stood the test of centuries, and I have filled my work with them. Dragons and magic and black-and-white dystopias.

My fan-fiction is funny and original. I ask any of you to say the same. The best you can come up with is shipping Draco and Hermione in an alternate universe. Well, I’ll tell you what, I have created parallel worlds where not only do characters have lives of their own, but Shakespeare’s authenticity is shadowed with doubt and people have dodos for pets. Top that.
For ^neurotype's 'Epic' Author-Off.
I'm masquerading as author-extraordinaire, Jasper Fforde. If you haven't read any of his stuff — please do. It's absolute gold, and I have failed to capture any of it's awesomeness (though not for lack of trying).

NOTE: I will probably be adding to this as time goes on (at least until the 24th November, which is the closing date), but I wanted to upload it in case I forgot to, so at least I'll have submitted something.

PS: You should check out my dear friend *SCFrankles' piece on Edward Lear, if you're into limericks (or even if you're not: check it out just because *SCFrankles is the most magnificent).
© 2013 - 2024 BlakeCurran
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TheFfordeFfan's avatar
What's wrong with Cumberbatch ? I'm a huge Fforde Ffan and I love Sherlock too !